While going through a divorce is undoubtedly hard on the two parties involved, it is also hard on any children that may be involved. Children sometimes cannot understand what is going on, and will have a hard time processing the divorce. There may not be anything that you can do to make the divorce easy on your children, but there are at least a few things you can do to make it a little easier.
Spend Time With Them
For starters, you should try to spend as much time with your children as you can. Do things that will allow them to take their minds off of the situation, and show them that they will still be able to have a good time with you going forward. Play board games, go to a movie, head over to a playground, or go grab some ice cream. It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you are spending some quality time with your children, and trying to keep their lives at least a little normal.
Talk With Them
If your children are old enough, talk with them about what is going on. Leaving your children in the dark about what is going on will not help, and will only leave them confused. Try to have an open and honest conversation with them about the situation, but be sure to refrain from blaming the other spouse. Even if you are your spouse are not on good terms, now is not the time to bring your children into this.
Do Not Fight Around Them
Another thing that you will want to watch out for is fighting around your children. Divorces can be messy, and often erupt into arguments. Whenever you feel like an argument is coming on, do it in a place that your children will not be able to overhear. If this is not possible, consider taking a walk to cool your head, rather than yelling at your spouse. Save the arguing for when your children are not home, and cannot overhear the conversation.
Be Cooperative With Your Spouse
In many divorces, your children will begin splitting time between each parent. It is important to respect the other parent’s time with your children, and not do anything to tarnish it. Be sure that the other parent gets their full allotted time, and do things that will make the transitions smoother. For example, if your kids will be staying overnight at their new place be sure to have them ready when pickup time arrives. You may not like your ex, but for the sake of your children, you should both try to cooperate when it comes to their well-being. This will result in less fighting and a more enjoyable experience for your kids.
Take Care Of Yourself
Lastly, remember to take care of your own needs as well. If you are stressed out or angry, it will negatively impact the time you have with your children. Take some time to yourself to relax, or get additional help if you need it. For example, if you are struggling with all of the paperwork that goes along with a divorce, consider using a place like National Family Solutions, which provides attorneys to help with legal documents related to family law. Anything you can do to take some of the stress off of your shoulders will improve your mood, and in turn improve your relationship with your kids.
Pay Attention To Their Needs
Divorces are stressful, and it can be all too easy to get wrapped up in your own thoughts and priorities. It is during this time that you need to remember to check in on your kids and see that their needs are being met. Spend some time with them, have fun, and try to keep the divorce between you and your spouse. If you can do this, the whole thing should be at least a little bit easier on your kids.
Image source via: www.fischer.senate.gov
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