Parenting: When Its Best To Step Aside

Tonight is supposed to be review night and I had it all lined up to write a lovely review for this awesome HP Officejet Pro 8600 printer, but I realized I didn’t have all the stuff together I needed for a proper review, like photo paper so I can show how well it prints photos. I’m really excited to share this printer with you, but that will wait until Tuesday. Tuesdays and Thursday evenings are my office nights away from the kids. So since I couldn’t get that going, I will just ramble here, actually I’ll talk about what we discovered with J during soccer.

Hunky Hubs and I discovered since Sunday, (J’s last soccer game) that we would stop yelling instructions at him from the sidelines. When your child is in an organized sport, or in a contest for something, you want to cheer and coach right along with the coaches, and I think we realized that J does better when we are quiet and let the coaches do their job. J Myster, being the youngest on the team is often found counting weeds, looking at kids on different fields playing soccer, standing there with his shirt over his head, or running in a circle while his teammates are running after the ball. Both Hunky Hubs and I would look at each other thinking, why won’t he at least chase after the thing like he does at home.

We got him his own soccer net and he kicks his ball into that net at home and does great! But with his teammates, that’s a different story.

We yell at him from the sidelines, “J get the ball”, “J kick the ball”, J run!!”  He’s the last one after the ball and often just chases his teammates. With that being said, there are two other boys on the team that tend to be powerhouses and kick the ball so far that it’s in other team’s fields, and they also fight with each other and get pretty distracted themselves. So distraction is kind of normal when you are coaching a bunch of four and five-year olds, but I have to say on the team, all the girls are perfect little players. They listen to their coach. Go figure! The boys however are off in la la land!

Anyway I’ve decided that during practices and games, I will keep my mouth shut. I am not going to yell at him from the sidelines anymore. I am going to sit there and let him be coached, and if he goes off into la la land, I am going to let the coach deal with it. Well tonight, it worked! I should have known he’d listen so much better to his coaches than he would to mom and dad. He kicked the ball twice tonight and ran after it! He also listened to his assistant coach during drills and followed as best as he could. So now Hunky Hubs and I will be sure to cheer and step in when appropriate, but really just sit back and let the kid be coached. I don’t know if it’s just that I’ve always micro managed him, but I’ve definitely realized how much more he pays attention when I step aside.

As a parent when do you find it the hardest to step aside and let your children make mistakes or learn something without your involvement?


About Heather Jones

I'm just a wife and mom of two boys trying to find her place in this world. I enjoy walks around the lake, bible journaling, and RV camping with my family.

Heartfully Heather


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Heather Jones

I'm just a wife and mom of two boys trying to find her place in this world. I enjoy walks around the lake, bible journaling, and RV camping with my family.

6 thoughts on “Parenting: When Its Best To Step Aside

  1. Soccer for the little ones is so fun! We have a little one the same age who plays. You’re right though, it is hard not to say, “Kick the ball,” when the ball is hitting them on the shin guards and they’re the only one in the entire vicinity, lol!

  2. Yeah, he’s making a progress for sure. They say that often kids are better behaved for other people than for their parents. I’m sure that also applies to this too.

  3. A few weeks ago at library craft & story time, I tried to help Phoenix with his scissors, and he flipped out. A few minutes later, the teacher came by, said the same thing, and he took direction like an angel. Right after, he looked at me… like he was waiting for an I-told-you-so, but I didn’t say a word. Sometimes need direction to come from elsewhere.

  4. Its so true. When I used to do home day care the moms would ask me what my trick was to getting their kids to go down for naps without a fuss, and I tell them its because I’m not you and they know they can’t guilt me. My own kids, a different story. 😉

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