Where Does Your Support System Come From?


Support systems come in many different ways. Traditionally, first starting out in life, you find your support system with your parents. Your parents should resemble pillars of strength, good judgment, love, understanding and endless encouragement. But what if you never had that support system? Without that support system, you are often doomed to never taking chances or never feeling like you have the ability to succeed. You’d be surprised to know that the most successful people out there have a really great support system. If you never had that support system growing up, it may mean you have to find it somewhere else. This means being a good judge of character and surrounding yourself with people who show compassion, a love and a willingness to help and support you in your endeavors, even if it’s risky. A good support system can help you take that risk, leap or jump that is often necessary to get going.

I am thankful that while I didn’t have that support system growing up, I have been a good judge of character and have surrounded myself with positive supportive friends and mentors. You can’t choose to whom and where you are born, but you can choose your friends. So with this, I want to encourage all those out there waiting for a dream to unfold, to “use” your support system. If they offer help, take it, rely on it and help back when you can. That is how friendship works right? It needs to be watered so that it flourishes and grows over time into a trusted relationship.

Even if you have had a glim start to life out on your own, it won’t always be that way. Hard work pays off! But you may have to chase it for a little while, study and learn all there is to know to get to where you want to be. No one is an expert until they’ve tried a dozen different avenues to know what works and what doesn’t work. These avenues have to be attempted, or that only makes you a dreamer. And dreaming is all fine and good, but eventually, you wake up from that dream if you don’t put your thoughts into action. If you don’t water the seeds for success and rely on your support system, you can’t do it alone for very far. At some point when running that marathon, you’ll have to stop for a cup of water, you’ll have to look to the sidelines for encouragement, you’ll need to splash water on your face to finish those last five miles, and you may often need a friend to help you over the finish line. It doesn’t matter if you needed the help, the point is that you finish. No successful person does it alone even if most of the work comes directly from them. There’s always helpers, assistants and cheerleaders getting you through so you can focus on the important things.

So the next time you are feeling discouraged and like this just won’t happen, re-evaluate your support system. Ask for help when you need it and offer help back. You’ll be surprised who takes you up on it. Be supportive to your friends and family and you will receive that support back.

About Heather Jones

I'm just a wife and mom of two boys trying to find her place in this world. I enjoy walks around the lake, bible journaling, and RV camping with my family.

Heartfully Heather


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Heather Jones

I'm just a wife and mom of two boys trying to find her place in this world. I enjoy walks around the lake, bible journaling, and RV camping with my family.

20 thoughts on “Where Does Your Support System Come From?

  1. My family is my support system. I was blessed to grow up in an awesome, loving family. My mom recently passed away and our family is even closer now as we rally around my dad. It’s so important to have someone in your life who is always there for you.

  2. I get support from family and friends. My sister and husband are my biggest supports because so many people can be so unreliable. A few close friends make every day better as well.

  3. I have read articles about mid-life aged people who don’t have much of a support system, being ultra busy. Also many older people who get divorced as seniors, esp the men, have no support system into old age. Hospitals and nursing home call them elder orphans, as the care facilities have nobody to call when something is happening.

    1. That’s sad Rosie. Sometimes you don’t know what pushes some family members away and what not. I know that my husband’s father was abusive and if he were alive today, I don’t think my husband would have much to do with him because of the childhood full of abuse. Often parents don’t realize that they kids they raise will one day turn around and take care of them and then when they need them, they aren’t there. It’s sad all around.

  4. I didn’t have a great support system while I was growing up either. I totally agree that you need to surround yourself with supportive people and carefully judge a person’s character. I find that I am overly cautious about letting people into my life perhaps because I don’t trust my own judgment. Thanks for sharing your own experience and I found this post very thought-provoking.

  5. This is a great post on support systems. My support system comes from my sisters. It is so true that to be successful you have to surround yourself with positive people. Supporting others helps you and those you are supporting. Thanks for sharing a great post.

  6. My support system was a bit traditional when I was a kid. As an adult now it is different, my Mom and sister are still there but I have some amazing girlfriends and they help me keep my sanity.

  7. Your perception of your support system can change as you grow and change and age. In high school, my friends were my support system. In hindsight, my family was always there.

  8. I’m lucky in that my support system is a two-in-one. My advantage is that I am best friends with all of my immediate family members. We truly are the dominos and that house of cards. We fall together, indivisible. We completely support each other and lift each other up. I truly feel blessed and lucky.

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