How do you know when you need coffee badly? Well, when you go to bed talking to your husband about the sounds you hear around the house at night, and then proceed to have a haunting sleep, thus causing you to crave that savory cup of joe first thing in the morning. For instance, when the wind blows, the gate on the side of the house rattles. So I was telling Hunky Hubs this and he says, “Oh maybe the house is haunted!” I quickly shush him because I’m convinced that even uttering the word “haunted” will call all kinds of roaming zombie-like ghosts to our house like some omen. He looks at me like I’m crazy. But I’m dead serious…”don’t say Haunted!!” , “SHOOOOSH!” So we lay down in bed and I do my usual bit of listening for things that aren’t there.
Baby B wakes sometime in the night and instead of rocking him in the squeaky rocking chair, I bring him to bed with me (Always a mistake, but I didn’t want to wake J with the squeaky chair). Eventually, my back starts hurting like it always does since I have to nurse in such an awkward position. But a light catches me from the kids’ room. So as I’m trying to quietly move Baby B back to his crib I see that his crib mobile is on. Now how in the hell did that get turned on? J Myster is sound a sleep and he’d have to crawl into the crib to turn it on. The hubs is asleep in bed, but mysteriously the mobile is on. In my head, I’m thinking thanks Hubs for calling the ghosts over due to the mere utterance of the word.
Trying to pretend I’m not scared shitless, I lay Baby B back in his crib, cover him with a blanket, turn off the mobile and go back to bed. If some ghost is watching me, I certainly don’t want them to see my pale white face (who can see that in the dark anyway). They must sense fear right? I’m not afraid! I tip toe back to my room trying to avoid all the floor boards I know that squeak because we all know babies wake at the sound of a needle falling to the floor. I tip toe to the bathroom to pee and contemplate even flushing…I mean that could make a sound and then I’d be back to square one with a baby in my bed and a sore back.
I lay in bed with my eyes on the doorway until I fall asleep. By morning, I’ve missed that my husband has already taken off for work and I awake to J Myster dive bombing himself on the bed next to Baby B and I. “Mommy wake up, I want prekfest!!” He chants this over and over until I move. Now at this hour logistics for a person dependent on coffee fall by the wayside. All you want is what you want…coffee. I have to wash the pot, hell no!!
And our town only has 1 drive thru Starbucks, across town. So oh well.
Oh did I forget to mention the mobile has a remote? It’s still a mystery as to who turned it on or where the remote is.
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