The Hardest Part About Being Human

CrystalCove

 

I think one of the hardest parts of being human is that moment when you realize that life has gone on uninterrupted for so many people you think about daily after you’ve moved away. That there’s so much you’ve missed or don’t even know about and you wish you did.  You wish someone would have said, “gosh I really have to tell Heather what happened, I’ll give her a call later!” The sad part about the world we live in is hardly anyone I know uses the phone anymore unless its a text and even now…I guess I just haven’t been worthy of a text. Not even worthy of a “Hi, how are you doing since you moved away?”

There have been so many times I wanted to pick up the phone and call people. There are a few people I CAN call and I know the call is welcome. But there are people that it became awkward to call especially in the weeks that followed our move. The call felt like I was inconveniencing them. There were people I thought I’d stay in touch with and haven’t. People I thought I had a better connection with and obviously didn’t. I think the hardest part is realizing the friendship never really mattered to them.

It has always been hard for me to make friends. Its my social awkwardness I guess. I see that same struggle in my son. So realizing that it just didn’t matter to them has truly been the loneliest part about moving. I have to suck it up though, put on a smile and move on with my life because no one else is crying here but me….which makes it even more lame.

So I’m going to stop being that lame person hoping and waiting for a phone call.

Goodbye road… why do I keep looking back to that same road that brought me here?

Goodbye rear view mirror… no one misses me.

Goodbye horizon, there’s no tears where the sun is setting.

Its been one year later and I’m still saying goodbye.  How lame is that!?

About Heather Jones

I'm a coffee addict wife, "work at home mom", mother to two boys, blogging about the latest life hacks, recipes, DIY Projects and crazy "momisodes".

Heartfully Heather

 

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Heather Jones

I'm a coffee addict wife, "work at home mom", mother to two boys, blogging about the latest life hacks, recipes, DIY Projects and crazy "momisodes".

24 thoughts on “The Hardest Part About Being Human

  1. Facing my fears helped me in the social awkwardness department Heather. Then I befriended more folks and had bonds where I could reach out and connect instantly. Feels unpleasant at first but being connected and releasing self-consciousness (largely, LOL) was worth a few uncomfortable moments. Ah, the human journey is fascinating for all of us. So much to learn and embrace. Thanks for sharing 🙂

  2. Wow heather, you’re such a good writer, it’s like I can feel how you’re feeling while you write it!

  3. Oh wow. This was such a powerful read! You are such an amazing writer, and I know you’re going rock moving forward. You sound like you’ve got your game plan in place and your game face on.

  4. It’s tough for me to make friends as well. I can be so awkward and I’m an introvert. I tend to not reach out. I really should try to be more social.

  5. This is a great post for a lot of reasons but mostly because I am one of those people who HATES to talk on the phone. I would rather just text or email with someone but I do agree that it is important to actually interact with people and hear someone’s voice. Great post!

  6. It is hard when you feel this way, I moved as a teen and it really hit me. It is somehow comforting to know that even all this time later those feelings were normal.

  7. I have never really moved away. College was the only time really and I was an hour away from home. I can’t imagine doing it now as an adult.

  8. Love this! I am an introvert as well and it is so hard to make connections. I can certainly relate.

  9. Moving can be so hard. As an adult, ive kept to myself for the most part. I dealt with too many immature people when I was in my late teens/early 20s that turned me off from finding friends outside my small circle.

    I remember what it was like to move from TX to NC with my x husband 21 years ago. He was stationed there. I didnt know anyone. It was hard because I was a very young mom, had my daughter at 19.

    When I moved back from NC to TX, after my divorce and being out there for 3 years as a single mom. I just couldn’t hack it by myself. Moving back helped a ton since I had a support system here. Then I met my now husband two years after moving back.

  10. I think you are at peace with how hard things are for you. You will be a good role model for your son and you can help each other.

  11. This is such a beautiful, heartfelt post. I can totally relate to some of the feelings you expressed here. When I moved to a new state, it was really hard saying goodbye to old friends and starting over with new friends.

  12. I feel the same way as well. I don’t connect with many like I know that I should. Most of the time I’d rather just stay home alone or with my children.

  13. Amazing post! It’s hard for me to make new friends, I am so shy in new situations and my anxiaty is crazy. Once people get to know me though, I don’t shut up and am beyond loyal. I just have to get over the anitial hump, luckily I have good group that has been around since 3rd grade so it’s more like family, unfortunetly I also left them in Boston and only see them once a year now.

    1. It’s so hard! I am that way too. I’ll bend over backwards for people and will drop what I’m doing to help people out. I just want to be in the loop. But at the same time I understand that life goes on and the last thing I want to do is inconvenience people.

  14. I feel your pain girl. It’s especially hard when you reach out to others and then when it isn’t reciprocated. I’ve felt this from people who do live near me, but I don’t talk to, hear from or see anymore.xoxo

    1. That’s hard too. You feel like, what if it’s me they are avoiding? In this busy world, people tend to go on autopilot with their lives forgetting to keep in touch with ones they care about. I’ve done it for sure and only when I moved did I notice how it felt on the other side of that move. I also think people (myself included) can be overly sensitive when someone doesn’t stay in touch and we read into things too much. I’m sure that is the case with me. We are so busy, it’s hard to stay connected, so when we see our friends lives on Facebook, it feels like we were there, which can extend the time in which you last truly connected.

  15. Moving to another place is already hard. But loosing people you care about is harder! But you have to move on! Good luck!

  16. I never had problems making friends. I left a group of friends back home in my home country when I left 7 years ago, but we still keep in touch. I don’t have close friends here in the U.S. since I got here, but it’s a choice I made because I do choose who I want to mingle with.

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