Do you ever feel like the Debbie Downer of the group? I try really hard not to be that way. Sometimes there are people who you talk to and the only thing they can do is talk about their problems. Now mind you, many people’s problems can be really significant and they need an outlet, a friend to talk to. It’s good to be that friend that can listen and lend an ear or a hug during rough times. Sometimes people just go through rough months and even rough years and they need all the support from friendships that they can get. I usually have one good friend I share things with, and keep the rest to myself even in casual conversation with others.
In light of my husband’s recent back surgery and healing setbacks, and the prior four years of debilitating back pain and how it affected his psyche, I felt like there was nothing good I could talk about. I’m an optimist by nature and usually try to find something to be grateful for. So to see my husband’s constant struggles really started to affect my own outlook on life. It seemed like he was taking every bullet and I was at a loss of how to help him. There’s only so many times you can say, “I’m so sorry you are going through this”, without sounding like a broken record.
And on that note, people eventually get tired of hearing about it as well. I think more people want to see the positive in your life, than hear about the negative anyway…but that leaves you sometimes feeling like you can’t talk to anyone. If you have a few good friends, hold on to them. Find a way to counteract all the negative in your life, with positive things to talk about.
How to Stay Positive:
Start A Positivity Journal – Grab a notebook and write down five different things each day that you are grateful for.
Do one thing for yourself each day – Whether it’s a bubble bath, enjoying a nice dessert, going for a walk, or watching your favorite TV show to unwind from a hard day, don’t neglect what makes you happy.
Call that one supportive friend – While you might feel like totally unloading on your friend, you have no idea what your friend might be going through on the other side of that phone. Always start your conversation about them, then let them ask about what is going on with you. This makes you a much better friend. It will also help bring fresh perspective to your current situation. Maybe things aren’t so bad.
Go take a walk to clear your head. Being outside often helps people find perspective.
It’s so easy to focus on the negative, so actively searching for the good in your life will really help you to let go of some of those negative things or figure out a solution to a bad situation.
How do you stay positive?
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